divot-longridge:

levilikesrain:

Another gender therapy appointment today.
I’m kinda getting sick of them, i feel like the therapist is digging for worms, i mean, i understand they have to ‘check’ i’m not transitioning on some whim, but just because i have a weird life story doesn’t mean its linked to my gender. 

She has suggested that i only want to transition to escape my mothers view of me, but the reality is that it took me so long to come out because of the negative language my mum uses to anyone that isn’t a slim petite feminine girly girl, which really affected me as a kid.
It made me have a lot of internalized homophobia and transphobia towards the image i actually felt i fit into. So i kept rejecting it.
 

She has also suggested that i am too articulate and try and fit in too much to each sentence, but i mean, the sessions are only an hour long and she’ll go off into asking me about things that really have no importance, like career things. So i feel i have to try and fit the actual important stuff in, because i don’t want to have these sessions anymore as i know 100% i’m doing the right thing transitioning and my mental health and positive body image reflects that.

gah maybe i’m bitching, i just don’t like people questioning my choices based on my upbringing.

You should trust your therapist. If they don’t think you are transgender, they can help you with whatever problem might be influencing you. Its a good thing not to have gender identity disorder, even if you’ve already made peace with it and have come to accept the likelihood with determination. 
Though what your therapist might be doing is suggesting things she knows it ISNT to get you to reflect on your resolve. Its a kind of reverse psychology thing. Still i would never have started hormones if my therapist hadn’t been on board 100%. I’d have taken daddy issues any day. It would’ve have saved me whats racked up to over 8k in surgery, legal shit and hormones. 

nah, she knows i have dysphoria and i’ve already been officially diagnosed with gender identity disorder by three different doctors.
She herself has also signed me off to see the dr to talk about top surgery etc. And i’ve been on hormones for 7 months.
I’m guessing she’s just working on building a kind of psychological profile of my history and marking key life events?
Idk, maybe i’m just scared they are going to turn around one day and stop prescribing me testosterone or not let me have any surgery. It’s an irrational fear, but i don’t have much faith in the NHS. 
Its a tough road to travel, transitioning. 

magictransistor:

Nigel Henderson. Collage for Patio and Pavilion (Cycle of Life and Death in a Pond), Head of a Man. Collage for Patio and Pavilion (top to bottom). 1956.

  • Too articulate?? Like what does that even mean???

    I know right?? It’s like, sorry i know what i’m trying to put across and that i’ve already thought and dealt with everything you’re asking me, so i already have a well thought out response.
    weird.

Another gender therapy appointment today.
I’m kinda getting sick of them, i feel like the therapist is digging for worms, i mean, i understand they have to ‘check’ i’m not transitioning on some whim, but just because i have a weird life story doesn’t mean its linked to my gender. 

She has suggested that i only want to transition to escape my mothers view of me, but the reality is that it took me so long to come out because of the negative language my mum uses to anyone that isn’t a slim petite feminine girly girl, which really affected me as a kid.
It made me have a lot of internalized homophobia and transphobia towards the image i actually felt i fit into. So i kept rejecting it.
 

She has also suggested that i am too articulate and try and fit in too much to each sentence, but i mean, the sessions are only an hour long and she’ll go off into asking me about things that really have no importance, like career things. So i feel i have to try and fit the actual important stuff in, because i don’t want to have these sessions anymore as i know 100% i’m doing the right thing transitioning and my mental health and positive body image reflects that.

gah maybe i’m bitching, i just don’t like people questioning my choices based on my upbringing.

feverinfeverout:

spocktography:

Laura Jane Grace & Against Me!

5/1/14 - Charlotte, NC @ Amos’ Southend

that shirt